I can't believe it's been so long since I've made a post here. Life just has a way of flying by. There have been so many times that I've thought of something or saw something that I wanted to post about and I though, oh I'll do it later...and then I'd completely forget about it.
Living in a town that has a church on practically every corner really gets on my nerves. I find it funny that every church has a sign out front where they feel the need to advertise to people or attempt to convince them that their God and the Bible is the one truth and whatnot. My thinking is, the more you feel you have to prove that something is true, the less it is. It's like a criminal in court trying to convince you that they're innocent. They plead and try to show evidence and coerce you into believing them. And the harder they try, the more likely it is that they're are completely guilty. If they are truly innocent, the truth should be clearly visible and require no effort to be seen. I love my faith and the path that I'm on. I don't have to prove the presence of Divine power, because the evidence is all around us and within each and every one of us. It's life. My beliefs are mine to cherish, and mine alone. I don't need any validation from people. I don't need to try to make others believe in the same things that I do. Everyone needs to come to their faith and their true path in their own way.
I wish I lived in a world without bias and without the stigma that's placed on people who don't follow the Christian faith, or one of the other "major" religions. I wish there were just people, and an understanding that everyone is unique in every way, including their faith and beliefs. What good are people if we are all exactly the same, believe the same things, think the same way. We would never be able to evolve and grow. Who wants to be just like everyone else? Certainly not me. But maybe that's the Aquarian in me...I like to be different. I feel like people have been brainwashed to buy into the ways of the masses. I don't know why I have been spared, don't know what the moment was that made me open my eyes and begin to question everything, but I am grateful. I just wish others could understand that. I fear that this will be a lifetime battle. I hope that one day people begin to see the light and see life the way that I, and so many others, do. I hope that one day everyone sees the Divine power in the world around them and they learn to celebrate the cycle of life, death, and rebirth of every living thing on Earth.
The path that I follow and the faith that I have is all for the honor and blessing of the Gods and Goddesses...the Divine power. It's not about me, it's not about where I end up when this life is over...it's about how I lived and what I accomplished, not for myself, but for the good of others and the will of the Divine. When I'm dead and gone my soul will go where it's meant to be, that does not matter to me...what matters is the legacy I leave to those that are left behind. It's the good I did and that I would wish others would continue to do. I may just be one person, but that doesn't mean that I am insignificant.
These are just a few thoughts that I've had on my mind recently. It feels good to write them down. I really do need to try to post more frequently. If I were the kind of person that made New Year's Resolutions, perhaps that would have been one of mine...but I'm not.
On an off-topic note...I really need to get some other thoughts down and off my mind...because I think I must be going crazy. My head is spinning and my heart is aching. I met a guy and I think I'm falling for him hard and fast. Maybe too fast, I don't know. My thoughts are so clouded with thoughts of him. All I know is that I haven't known this feeling in quite some time. We talk to each other practically every day. He's on my mind almost every second of the day. We've only been on two "dates", if you can call them that (I won't go into details), but I can't stop longing for him and wondering when I get to see him again. I saw him today, but only for an hour. He's in the Air Force and he's been called up to help with the Haiti earthquake disaster. Even hours later I can still feel his kiss on my lips. I know that he has an important job to do and I am grateful for all the military does, I just hope that he returns soon and safely. I feel like I should be crazy for missing him while he's gone, since I barely know him. But when we talk, I feel like I've known him all my life. I am usually shy and reserved around people I first meet, but it hasn't been like that with him at all. I can only hope that these feelings I have will blossom into love and that he shares those feelings with me. But I'm afraid that I am setting myself up for hurt and heartache. I'm afraid that I'm falling for him too quickly and that I'm getting my hopes up in wishing for a long-term relationship. But all signs from him point to him wishing for it as well. I can tell that he has had poor relationships in the past, even though we haven't discussed things like that before, but I hope he gives me the chance to show him that I am different and full of a life and love that he won't want to live without.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Monday, September 21, 2009
The Bible Says...
I was looking up a passage in one of my old Bibles the other day. It's a teen study bible, so it has added content for teens. In the back of the Bible there is an index of subjects (such as family, parents, money, sin, etc.) and page numbers where you can find them. Well I happened to turn to the page that had Magic on it. So out of curiosity I looked at the two page numbers that were listed to see what this Bible had to say.
The first one had nothing to do with magic (it was just a reference to someone using God's name as a "magic" word). But the second page made me laugh, but it also made me kind of mad. It's a section called "The Bible Says" and this one was on magic. Here is what is says...
"Today's magicians pull rabbits out of hats and do other tricks to make people or even elephants seem to disappear. Real magic involves the use of charms, spells or rituals to influence people or events. Much magic in Bible times was an attempt to control demons and other supernatural beings. To some extent, all occult practices involve the use of real magic. People often turn to magic because they want more control over what happens to them. They're afraid, and they don't trust God's control over the events of their lives. When many people in Ephesus became Christians, they realized the evil in real magic. They burned their books of magic (Acts 19:18-20). People who know that God loves them don't have to be afraid of the future. God is in control, and he will take care of them always."
It amazes me that people actually believe this. It's no wonder that Christians have such a skewed view of Paganism. So let's point out the places where this passage went wrong (at least in regard to my own beliefs, I know this won't apply to everyone but it's how I feel and what I think).
1. If you are going to reference "real" magic...spell it correctly. Magic is pulling rabbits out of hats. Magick is what is real.
2. Pagans who practice magick don't believe in demons.
3. Magick isn't about control, it's about spirituality and a connection to the Divine.
4. Pagans trust God's control and the Goddess' control. But the future isn't set in stone, we can still plead our case.
5. Magick in and of itself isn't evil.
6. Paganism is not about being afraid of the future.
I don't know who came up with this crap, but it's ridiculous! In my opinion of course...
The first one had nothing to do with magic (it was just a reference to someone using God's name as a "magic" word). But the second page made me laugh, but it also made me kind of mad. It's a section called "The Bible Says" and this one was on magic. Here is what is says...
"Today's magicians pull rabbits out of hats and do other tricks to make people or even elephants seem to disappear. Real magic involves the use of charms, spells or rituals to influence people or events. Much magic in Bible times was an attempt to control demons and other supernatural beings. To some extent, all occult practices involve the use of real magic. People often turn to magic because they want more control over what happens to them. They're afraid, and they don't trust God's control over the events of their lives. When many people in Ephesus became Christians, they realized the evil in real magic. They burned their books of magic (Acts 19:18-20). People who know that God loves them don't have to be afraid of the future. God is in control, and he will take care of them always."
It amazes me that people actually believe this. It's no wonder that Christians have such a skewed view of Paganism. So let's point out the places where this passage went wrong (at least in regard to my own beliefs, I know this won't apply to everyone but it's how I feel and what I think).
1. If you are going to reference "real" magic...spell it correctly. Magic is pulling rabbits out of hats. Magick is what is real.
2. Pagans who practice magick don't believe in demons.
3. Magick isn't about control, it's about spirituality and a connection to the Divine.
4. Pagans trust God's control and the Goddess' control. But the future isn't set in stone, we can still plead our case.
5. Magick in and of itself isn't evil.
6. Paganism is not about being afraid of the future.
I don't know who came up with this crap, but it's ridiculous! In my opinion of course...
Monday, July 20, 2009
Reflections Upon a Sunday
Yesterday was another Sunday spent going to church with my parents. This week our regular pastor was out (his son had gotten married the day before) and so the guy taking his place led a rather interesting sermon. He played a clip from "Penn Says," a video blog by Penn (of Penn & Teller). Penn is a devout Atheist and is known for speaking his mind. The clip we watch was mild compared to most others. He talked about a man that approached him after a show and had nothing but good things to say. Penn says that the man seemed genuine and he gave Penn a Gideon Bible with an inscription to him in the front. Penn accepted it even though he knew that he believed nothing of what the Bible said. But what struck me is what he had to say about the whole situation.
He repeated said that this was a "really good guy." He appreciated that this man felt strongly enough about his own beliefs that he needed to share them. Penn says that if you know for certain that what the Bible says is true, then how much do you have to hate someone to not tell them. Like if you knew without a shadow of a doubt that someone you knew was going to be hit by a bus tomorrow, how much would you have to hate them to not warn them.
He has a good point. It doesn't change my views or beliefs, just as I'm sure it didn't change his, but it was just some good food for thought. I think that people could take that lesson and apply to all areas of life. If you know of something or someone that is causing another harm, how much do you have to hate them not to do anything? I think that's a call, not to Christians, but to people everywhere to do what's right and help those around them that are suffering, or hurting, or in want. How much do you have to hate the man who thirsts, to not give him a drink? How much do you have to hate the woman who is starving, to not give her something to eat? How much do you have to hate the child who is beaten, to not tell someone who can help?
No, this sermon won't turn me back to Christianity, but it will turn me back toward humanity. Back toward serving and helping others. So perhaps my attending church isn't a total loss, there are still important lessons that I can learn to apply in my own life. Lessons that will guide me down the path of my own making toward the Divine and the truth.
He repeated said that this was a "really good guy." He appreciated that this man felt strongly enough about his own beliefs that he needed to share them. Penn says that if you know for certain that what the Bible says is true, then how much do you have to hate someone to not tell them. Like if you knew without a shadow of a doubt that someone you knew was going to be hit by a bus tomorrow, how much would you have to hate them to not warn them.
He has a good point. It doesn't change my views or beliefs, just as I'm sure it didn't change his, but it was just some good food for thought. I think that people could take that lesson and apply to all areas of life. If you know of something or someone that is causing another harm, how much do you have to hate them not to do anything? I think that's a call, not to Christians, but to people everywhere to do what's right and help those around them that are suffering, or hurting, or in want. How much do you have to hate the man who thirsts, to not give him a drink? How much do you have to hate the woman who is starving, to not give her something to eat? How much do you have to hate the child who is beaten, to not tell someone who can help?
No, this sermon won't turn me back to Christianity, but it will turn me back toward humanity. Back toward serving and helping others. So perhaps my attending church isn't a total loss, there are still important lessons that I can learn to apply in my own life. Lessons that will guide me down the path of my own making toward the Divine and the truth.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Receiving Signs?
I don't quite know where to start with this because I'm not sure I understand it. I've always felt like I know that certain things are going to happen before they happen. It's usually more of a general feeling that something bad is going to happen rather than knowing an exact event. But lately I believe that I'm receiving signs of deaths that are about to occur.
Last November I was down in my basement going through some old boxes of stuff from when I was a kid. I came across an old photo from a pool party my parents had. The photo was of a friend of ours jumping off the diving board. Literally the next day I got the phone call that that same person died of an overdose.
What really has me kind of spooked is that yesterday I was down in my basement again, looking for something in the boxes and I found an old Michael Jackson tape. And of course he died today. I've learned enough in my years of studies to know that there are no coincidences.
It's happened other times as well when something (a picture, something in a store, a story, etc.) will suddenly make me think of someone. Then I'll later learn that they died or something bad happened to them (an accident or something like that).
So obviously I'm being given signs, but what am I supposed to do with them? And how do I know what are signs and what's just random thoughts? Anyone have any experiences, advice, or thoughts about this? If so, please comment or send me a message. I'm just not sure what to make of it. It's such an eerie feeling.
Last November I was down in my basement going through some old boxes of stuff from when I was a kid. I came across an old photo from a pool party my parents had. The photo was of a friend of ours jumping off the diving board. Literally the next day I got the phone call that that same person died of an overdose.
What really has me kind of spooked is that yesterday I was down in my basement again, looking for something in the boxes and I found an old Michael Jackson tape. And of course he died today. I've learned enough in my years of studies to know that there are no coincidences.
It's happened other times as well when something (a picture, something in a store, a story, etc.) will suddenly make me think of someone. Then I'll later learn that they died or something bad happened to them (an accident or something like that).
So obviously I'm being given signs, but what am I supposed to do with them? And how do I know what are signs and what's just random thoughts? Anyone have any experiences, advice, or thoughts about this? If so, please comment or send me a message. I'm just not sure what to make of it. It's such an eerie feeling.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Blessed Litha
Yesterday was Litha, the summer solstice. To celebrate the holiday I held a ritual to re-dedicate myself to the study of the craft and to the Divine. It was a wonderful rite and I had a couple interesting experiences. At the end of the rite I did some divination work with my crystal ball (first time I've used it) and the flame of a candle. I say for a while and let images come to me. I saw a few faces pass by, but one image that stayed for quite a while was my dog (that we just had to put down a couple weeks ago), so that was pretty special. Then, when I was finished I reached over to pick my glasses up off the floor next to me and noticed a large spider. It seemed like it was just sitting there watching me work, because before I even moved to get up it left. It was so strange, but so cool at the same time (I suppose it's a good thing that I'm not afraid of spiders!).
As I thought about the spider, I realized that spiders have emerged as a common theme lately. They keep coming to me in odd situations. First I was at school and as I was leaving the classroom there was a spider that crawled across the floor and a couple girls shrieked and one kept yelling at the other to step on it. I told them to let it go, that it wasn't hurting anyone. Afterward I felt really good about what I did for the spider (which was strange to me). Then I was at the zoo and was walking into an exhibit when someone behind me stopped me because there was a big spider on my shirt and they brushed it off. Then the one last night. I think I need to explore what my guides are trying to tell me.
As I thought about the spider, I realized that spiders have emerged as a common theme lately. They keep coming to me in odd situations. First I was at school and as I was leaving the classroom there was a spider that crawled across the floor and a couple girls shrieked and one kept yelling at the other to step on it. I told them to let it go, that it wasn't hurting anyone. Afterward I felt really good about what I did for the spider (which was strange to me). Then I was at the zoo and was walking into an exhibit when someone behind me stopped me because there was a big spider on my shirt and they brushed it off. Then the one last night. I think I need to explore what my guides are trying to tell me.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Update on the "talk"
Well, they just left and it did go better than I thought. They did think that because I had a book like that that it meant I was practicing witchcraft. Which of course it's not, the fact that I do is completely beside the point. Anyway, I pretty much reassured them that I didn't believe anything in that book was real.
They did turn it into a question of my beliefs. They asked if I believed in God, and I said yes (but left out that I also believe in Goddess as well). Then they asked me flat out if I'm a Christian...that was a little difficult to work around. I told them that I'm not one to blindly follow a path that someone else says that I should. That I'm searching for the truth and that no one can know with absolute certainty what the truth is until they find out in death. I brought up other religions (Hinduism, Buddhism, Judaism...) and that they all believe theirs is the correct path and that maybe we are all wrong, but we can't know that. Even my dad said that if we lived in another part of the world that we may have practiced another religion.
So I think they have accepted that I'm searching for the right path. It's obvious that they aren't ready to know that I've found it in Paganism. So I'll remain in the "broom closet" a while longer. Right now I'm fine with them thinking that this is some kind of hobby or interest rather than my actual beliefs. I'm just glad to have this conversation over with. And as for the book, they have left it up to me whether I keep it or send it back (although I know they want me to send it back). I told them it's no different than collecting Star Wars memorabilia, so I think I'll keep it (but keep it hidden so they don't have to see it again).
They did turn it into a question of my beliefs. They asked if I believed in God, and I said yes (but left out that I also believe in Goddess as well). Then they asked me flat out if I'm a Christian...that was a little difficult to work around. I told them that I'm not one to blindly follow a path that someone else says that I should. That I'm searching for the truth and that no one can know with absolute certainty what the truth is until they find out in death. I brought up other religions (Hinduism, Buddhism, Judaism...) and that they all believe theirs is the correct path and that maybe we are all wrong, but we can't know that. Even my dad said that if we lived in another part of the world that we may have practiced another religion.
So I think they have accepted that I'm searching for the right path. It's obvious that they aren't ready to know that I've found it in Paganism. So I'll remain in the "broom closet" a while longer. Right now I'm fine with them thinking that this is some kind of hobby or interest rather than my actual beliefs. I'm just glad to have this conversation over with. And as for the book, they have left it up to me whether I keep it or send it back (although I know they want me to send it back). I told them it's no different than collecting Star Wars memorabilia, so I think I'll keep it (but keep it hidden so they don't have to see it again).
So annoyed! What do I do...?
Ok, so I'm a HUGE fan of the show Charmed and have been since it first aired. I own all 8 seasons on DVD and know just about all there is to know about the show. So I was looking around online and found a replica of the show's Book of Shadows and I bought it. Well it came in the mail on Friday and I was down at my parent's house and the mailman brought it there (instead of my house for some unknown reason). Anyway, I opened it and looked at it a little bit before we left on our trip down to Indianapolis for the weekend.
We got back from the trip today and I asked my mom to bring my book up to me when she brought my luggage. Well she brought my bags, but "forgot" the book. She said she was going to go home to get it and brink it back (we live right next door to each other). Well, I waited and waited and she never came back.
So I called her and asked her if she was coming up and she gives me the whole "we need to talk" line. She and my dad looked at the book and think it's "pretty scary". OMG, it's a prop from a TV show!!!! So now tomorrow they want to sit down and talk about this book. What am I supposed to say to them? For crying out loud, I'm 25 years old and it's a FICTIONAL book! They want to see a book about witchcraft, I'll show them my real BOS, geez! This is such bull and it's not worth my time.
I'm exhausted tonight, but I know I'm not going to able to sleep and tomorrow I'll be all stressed out because I know this "talk" is going to turn into a huge screaming fight. Why can't they mind their own **** business?! They have no problem with me reading Twilight. What's the difference? Apparently books about vampires aren't as scary as books about witches. Whatever... And they wonder why I feel like I have to hide things from them. It's because they do stupid crap like this to piss me off!
I've told them it's a prop from a TV show and apparently that's not enough for them. I was thinking about having the show on when they came up to show them. But what I don't get, is that THEY bought me most of the seasons from the show on DVD. My mom has seen bits and pieces of the show when I've watched it at their house. So obviously something else is bothering them. This is just ridiculous!
I have every intention of making it VERY clear to them that this book has absolutely nothing to do with my religious beliefs. If I believed in everything that's in that show I would deserve professional help. That's crazy. I know the difference between fantasy and reality. I think that they don't believe that I do. And that's their issue and not mine.
I'm sure I'm stressing over all this and it's not going to be as bad as I think it will. And I certainly hope that's the case. I've been in such a horrible mood all day and I hate it! It's so draining to go around this pissed off about something. I'll be glad when this is over. Worse case scenario, I'm prepared to find a new place to live, a job, and keeping them out of my life until they can get over themselves. They don't own me and they can't force their beliefs on me. And I don't need their permission to own a book (no matter what book it is)!
I'll post an update after they leave!
~Lyra
We got back from the trip today and I asked my mom to bring my book up to me when she brought my luggage. Well she brought my bags, but "forgot" the book. She said she was going to go home to get it and brink it back (we live right next door to each other). Well, I waited and waited and she never came back.
So I called her and asked her if she was coming up and she gives me the whole "we need to talk" line. She and my dad looked at the book and think it's "pretty scary". OMG, it's a prop from a TV show!!!! So now tomorrow they want to sit down and talk about this book. What am I supposed to say to them? For crying out loud, I'm 25 years old and it's a FICTIONAL book! They want to see a book about witchcraft, I'll show them my real BOS, geez! This is such bull and it's not worth my time.
I'm exhausted tonight, but I know I'm not going to able to sleep and tomorrow I'll be all stressed out because I know this "talk" is going to turn into a huge screaming fight. Why can't they mind their own **** business?! They have no problem with me reading Twilight. What's the difference? Apparently books about vampires aren't as scary as books about witches. Whatever... And they wonder why I feel like I have to hide things from them. It's because they do stupid crap like this to piss me off!
I've told them it's a prop from a TV show and apparently that's not enough for them. I was thinking about having the show on when they came up to show them. But what I don't get, is that THEY bought me most of the seasons from the show on DVD. My mom has seen bits and pieces of the show when I've watched it at their house. So obviously something else is bothering them. This is just ridiculous!
I have every intention of making it VERY clear to them that this book has absolutely nothing to do with my religious beliefs. If I believed in everything that's in that show I would deserve professional help. That's crazy. I know the difference between fantasy and reality. I think that they don't believe that I do. And that's their issue and not mine.
I'm sure I'm stressing over all this and it's not going to be as bad as I think it will. And I certainly hope that's the case. I've been in such a horrible mood all day and I hate it! It's so draining to go around this pissed off about something. I'll be glad when this is over. Worse case scenario, I'm prepared to find a new place to live, a job, and keeping them out of my life until they can get over themselves. They don't own me and they can't force their beliefs on me. And I don't need their permission to own a book (no matter what book it is)!
I'll post an update after they leave!
~Lyra
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