Amazing how time slips away...

I can't believe it's been so long since I've made a post here. Life just has a way of flying by. There have been so many times that I've thought of something or saw something that I wanted to post about and I though, oh I'll do it later...and then I'd completely forget about it.

Living in a town that has a church on practically every corner really gets on my nerves. I find it funny that every church has a sign out front where they feel the need to advertise to people or attempt to convince them that their God and the Bible is the one truth and whatnot. My thinking is, the more you feel you have to prove that something is true, the less it is. It's like a criminal in court trying to convince you that they're innocent. They plead and try to show evidence and coerce you into believing them. And the harder they try, the more likely it is that they're are completely guilty. If they are truly innocent, the truth should be clearly visible and require no effort to be seen. I love my faith and the path that I'm on. I don't have to prove the presence of Divine power, because the evidence is all around us and within each and every one of us. It's life. My beliefs are mine to cherish, and mine alone. I don't need any validation from people. I don't need to try to make others believe in the same things that I do. Everyone needs to come to their faith and their true path in their own way.

I wish I lived in a world without bias and without the stigma that's placed on people who don't follow the Christian faith, or one of the other "major" religions. I wish there were just people, and an understanding that everyone is unique in every way, including their faith and beliefs. What good are people if we are all exactly the same, believe the same things, think the same way. We would never be able to evolve and grow. Who wants to be just like everyone else? Certainly not me. But maybe that's the Aquarian in me...I like to be different. I feel like people have been brainwashed to buy into the ways of the masses. I don't know why I have been spared, don't know what the moment was that made me open my eyes and begin to question everything, but I am grateful. I just wish others could understand that. I fear that this will be a lifetime battle. I hope that one day people begin to see the light and see life the way that I, and so many others, do. I hope that one day everyone sees the Divine power in the world around them and they learn to celebrate the cycle of life, death, and rebirth of every living thing on Earth.

The path that I follow and the faith that I have is all for the honor and blessing of the Gods and Goddesses...the Divine power. It's not about me, it's not about where I end up when this life is over...it's about how I lived and what I accomplished, not for myself, but for the good of others and the will of the Divine. When I'm dead and gone my soul will go where it's meant to be, that does not matter to me...what matters is the legacy I leave to those that are left behind. It's the good I did and that I would wish others would continue to do. I may just be one person, but that doesn't mean that I am insignificant.

These are just a few thoughts that I've had on my mind recently. It feels good to write them down. I really do need to try to post more frequently. If I were the kind of person that made New Year's Resolutions, perhaps that would have been one of mine...but I'm not.

On an off-topic note...I really need to get some other thoughts down and off my mind...because I think I must be going crazy. My head is spinning and my heart is aching. I met a guy and I think I'm falling for him hard and fast. Maybe too fast, I don't know. My thoughts are so clouded with thoughts of him. All I know is that I haven't known this feeling in quite some time. We talk to each other practically every day. He's on my mind almost every second of the day. We've only been on two "dates", if you can call them that (I won't go into details), but I can't stop longing for him and wondering when I get to see him again. I saw him today, but only for an hour. He's in the Air Force and he's been called up to help with the Haiti earthquake disaster. Even hours later I can still feel his kiss on my lips. I know that he has an important job to do and I am grateful for all the military does, I just hope that he returns soon and safely. I feel like I should be crazy for missing him while he's gone, since I barely know him. But when we talk, I feel like I've known him all my life. I am usually shy and reserved around people I first meet, but it hasn't been like that with him at all. I can only hope that these feelings I have will blossom into love and that he shares those feelings with me. But I'm afraid that I am setting myself up for hurt and heartache. I'm afraid that I'm falling for him too quickly and that I'm getting my hopes up in wishing for a long-term relationship. But all signs from him point to him wishing for it as well. I can tell that he has had poor relationships in the past, even though we haven't discussed things like that before, but I hope he gives me the chance to show him that I am different and full of a life and love that he won't want to live without.